Are You Living Life Fully?

       Many things can stand in the way of living life to the fullest.  In our busy society, it is easy to become overloaded, stressed, fatigued, or overwhelmed.  Here are a few tips for a fulfilling life.

 6 Tips for Living Life Fully:

BE POSITIVE.  Learn to recognize the negative thoughts you have.  Whether they are self-doubts, criticisms of others, or complaints.  Then stop yourself and replace these negative thoughts with positive thoughts, encouragements or solutions.  You will change your life for the better and be much happier!

LOVE.  “The greatest of these is love.”  Love your family, friends and neighbors.  Fall in love with your spouse again.  Tell your children daily that they are loved.  Love those who don’t love you. 

SPEND TIME WITH PEOPLE OF ALL AGES.  Play with children.  They really know how to live in the moment.  They experience life fully.  Learn to be like them.  Talk to someone older than you.  They will tell you amazing stories; give you advice, so you don’t make the same mistakes.  They are the wisdom of society.  Take advantage of that wisdom and learn from them.

FIND GOD.  God is everywhere.  If you look hard enough you will find the Divine in the most obscure places.  When you do, your heart will warm and you will experience a gentle contentment, regardless of your circumstances.
REDISCOVER WHAT IS IMPORTANT.  Sit down; take a full hour to write out all the things that are important to you.  Then cut the list down to 4-5 things.  This is your “What REALLY Matters List.”  Focus your life on these things.  Don’t take them for granted.  Make time for them. 
EXERCISE.  Go for a walk.  Try running or biking.  Play golf or tennis.  Go for a hike or a swim.  Whatever you do, get active.  And life will be more alive.

Many people worry about the perceptions that others have of them.  But worrying about what other people think holds us back from being ourselves and maximizing our full potential.  If you want to live a happy life, stop worrying about what others think. 

Here are a few reasons to let go of seeking approval from others:

Allows for a solid sense of self-worth.  People who feel good about themselves generally attract other healthy, solid people into their lives.  If we link our own self worth to someone else’s opinions, we lose a sense of self.  Holding true to who you are brings about healthier, happier relationships with others who respect you.

People’s judgments rarely hold truth.  Often, when people judge, it is more a reflection of who they are as a person and not a reflection of you.  Judgmental people are often insecure and looking to boost their own self-esteem by putting other’s down.  Know who you are and be proud of all your good qualities.

You don’t always know what people think.  We often get caught up in assumptions about what others think of us.  Assumptions are a huge waste of energy and usually cause negative emotions.  We can never really know what others think.  Stop making assumptions and you will have more inner peace.

Less worry frees up energy for more important things.   Worrying about other’s opinions take a lot of energy and doesn’t change or accomplish anything.  Letting go of worry allows you more energy to focus on being your best and enjoying the good people in your life.

Teens will test their parents in every possible way.  When they do, a stressed out parent may react in ways that don’t always build relationship.  If you are in need of strengthening your relationship, consider implementing some of the following:

Spend one-on-one time together each week.  Take you child out to breakfast or lunch.  Even if they resist, you must insist.  Make it a weekly habit.

Talk to your teen.  Be prepared with topics that will be interesting to your teen.  You don’t have to have lengthy conversations.  Ask the right kind of questions.  Find out their opinion, or how they might do something, or where they would go.  Never belittle their opinion.

Listen more.  Resist the temptation to lecture or tell your teen what you think.  Teens don’t really listen until they can become discussion initiators.  Step back and let them take the lead.

Do something fun together.  Play paintball, go horseback riding, go camping, canoeing, laser tag, take a day-trip, do something spur of the moment.  Do something they like to do.  Make happy memories together.

Establish boundaries.  Be a parent – acting more like a friend can hurt, not help, your relationship.  Tell them what you expect.  Clearly establish your rules for the household, school work, & extra-curricular activities.

Correct and discipline.  Even when it makes you feel uncomfortable, your teen needs to know you love them enough to correct them when they break your rules or the rules of society.  And be sure to reward a teen for good behavior with more privileges and freedom.

 

Your kids learn more from watching you than you can imagine.  Be the kind of adult you want your teen to become.  Serve others.  Love others.  Forgive others.

For more information please visit Jupiter Community Counseling or call (561) 748-1244

  • You enjoy being with others and you also enjoy time alone.
  • You allow others to think and feel differently than you do.
  • You have compassion for others without taking on their burdens.
  • You are able to accept responsibility for your choices and actions.
  • You can openly hear the opinions of others but ultimately make your own decisions.
  • You can be flexible if things don’t go as planned.
  • You understand your priorities and you honor them.

For more information please visit Jupiter Community Counseling or call (561) 748-1244

Over the years, I have worked with hundreds of couples seeking to improve their relationship.  There are several common behaviors that prevent a relationship from being the best it can be.  Letting go of the following, will allow your relationship to flourish and grow:

Give up blame.  There are many things going on in a good relationship, but there is only one thing going on in a bad relationship.  Blame.  People often get trapped in the “blame game,” spending time pointing out or dwelling on their partner’s flaws.  This will always lead to unhappiness in a relationship.  Instead of wasting time focused on what the other person is doing wrong, look at where you might make some improvements.  Stop blaming and work on improving yourself.

Give up the need to be right.  Can you remember the “romance phase” of your relationship and how kind you were to one another?  Back then, you did not care about being right, you primarily cared about making the other person feel loved and cared for.  Give up the need to be right and to prove your point.  Instead, choose to be loving and supportive.  People who are in a healthy relationship are polite and kind to each other, and don’t need to be right.

Give up criticism.  Give up the need to criticize what your partner does or does not do.  Instead start appreciating all the good qualities your partner displays.  Remember the things about your partner that made you so attracted to them in the first place.

Give up control.  The more you try to control your partner, the more you will push them away.  People are not meant to be controlled, they are meant to be loved.  Control and manipulation always create resentment.  Give up control and allow the person you love to be who they are and not who you need them to be.

 

Give up unrealistic expectations.  No relationship is perfect.  No person is perfect.  Don’t view relationship as a beautiful basket full of everything you have always longed for. View relationship for what it is – an empty basket where you put into it all the things that you want to take out.  Relationships take work – a lot of work.  If you want love, trust, happiness, support and kindness, YOU must put it in the basket.  Relationships don’t work unless you do.

For more information please visit Jupiter Community Counseling or call (561) 748-1244